Dealing with low self-esteem
Whenever you are questioning your worth you need to challenge your thinking with what scripture says about you and who you are in Christ. Low self-esteem is based on what you believe about yourself. You may have received negative messages from your parents, from your friends or spouse – which caused you feel worthless. No matter what the cause for your low self-esteem – God does not make junk! God places great value on you. He sent His Son to die for your sins because of His desire to know you and make you part of His heaven-bound family!
In the Search for Significance, Robert McGee, writes that there are false beliefs behind low self-worth:
- When I fail at something, I feel lousy about myself.
- When others don’t approve of me, I can’t seem to get over it.
- Sometimes it feels like I’ll never measure up.
- I’m so hopeless.
These beliefs are contrary to scripture and will prevent your self-worth from growing. You must challenge these beliefs with the truths of scripture. Jesus Christ proclaims the following facts about who you are as His child, as His servant and as His friend. When you are a Christian – someone who has trusted fully in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior and repented from sin – you have a brand new identity in Christ! Do you believe what Jesus says about you or the false beliefs underneath low self-esteem?
- John 1:12 Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.
- John 15:5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
- John 14:13-21 And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father. You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever- the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you. Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me. He who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love him and show myself to him.”
- Acts 10:43 “All the prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name.”
- Eph 1:7 “In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace .”
- Col 1:13-14 “For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.” (NIV)
What are the truths about your identity from these verses?
- That you are a Child of the God of the universe because you have trusted in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior.
- That Christ lives in you and you live in Christ.
- That when you allow Jesus to have control of your life, you will produce valuable works which glorify God.
- That Jesus will hear your prayers and answer them.
- That the Father and the Son love you.
- That you have forgiveness and eternal life because of your relationship with and faith in Christ.
What more validation can a person want than to have the approval, love, forgiveness and inheritance of our Lord Jesus Christ?
This must take pre-eminence in your life. Jesus Christ is the way, the TRUTH, and the life. What He says is true, not what anyone else says or does, not any thoughts you have which contradict scripture.
When you grow in this understanding of who you are in Christ, you can let go of wrong thinking or any rejection from others. You can rise above the ‘blues’ of depression and say with the Psalmist, “Why are you so downcast O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? For I will yet praise Him – my Savior and my Lord.” Psa. 42:5
You will be determined to follow God’s will and trust Him for your life despite the trials of menopause.
When you believe that you are valuable in God’s sight – you will start acting like it. You will assert yourself and set boundaries so people will treat you with the dignity a person made in God’s image deserves.
Maybe you have been looking for your identity in the approval of others and/or in your performance and role at work or at home. Now is the time to transition from finding out who you are in what you do — to finding out who you are in Christ!
Here are some facts about your new identity and who you are in Christ from Scriptures:
1. You are now a child of God and part of God’s family: John 1:12
2. You are a new creation in Christ — the old has gone — the new has come! 2 Corinthians 5:17
3. You have been justified by faith in Christ and have peace with God….thus, you no longer have to work to try to make yourself right before God. Romans 5:1
4. You have been completely forgiven through faith in Christ and His death and resurrection: Ephesians 1:7
5. You are completely loved by God in Christ: Romans 5:8; John 17:23; John 3:16
6. You are “in Christ”: John 17:21; Colossians 3:3
7. You are on your way to heaven: John 3:16, 36.
8. Nothing can separate you from the love of Christ: Romans 8:35-39
9. The Holy Spirit now indwells you forever: John 14:16; Ephesians 1:14
10. You have a new purpose in life — to live for Christ and to know and share His love with others: Philippians 1:21, 3:13-14; Colossians 2:6-7;
Matt 5:14-16 “You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. (15) Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. (16) In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.” NIV
In other words, concentrate now on living fully for Christ. In living fully for Christ you will find strength and hope for living; new meaning for your life and a new identity; an eternal perspective when you feel troubled by the changes menopause causes in your life. Your faith can bring you hope about the circumstances and people around you; a joy even when life disappoints you because Jesus loves you and will carry you through.